small steps

small steps

Wednesday, March 13, 2013

Something new.





I walked out the eye doctor's office this morning after a check up & walked out entering the world of glasses.

Several Saturday's ago on a sunny, mild January afternoon I headed out for a run and 2 hours later found myself in the emergency room with a punctured cornea. Long story. Freak accident. God is so good--it could have been a lot worse. If you'd like more details you can ask me in person or ask the 200 some people I had to explain the story to the next day at church as I had to wear an eye patch for several days. I did not feel cool. I did not feel like a pirate. I felt like a clumsy 20-something with an eyepatch.

All that to say the healing process post punctured cornea has gone super smoothly despite a couple headaches which have now vanished. I haven't had any vision issues (Praise God)--until I noticed some pictures taken with students over the weekend...my right eye was looking just a tad lazy. I had my last follow up appointment set up for this morning anyways and sure enough...my right eye despite the perfectly healed cornea needs to kick it into gear a little & I left with new strengthening glasses for the next couple of weeks.

I am a girl who struggles with change. Things that may seem like not a huge deal to 90 percent of people are usually a huge deal to me--for whatever reason that is part of my wiring. That's how I've always been and how I've always reacted to changes in my life. I cling to the change and how it was instead of anticipating what could be because of it--at some point I always come around but for the most part it's not without struggle.

In my walk with Jesus, I am learning that HE is all about change. It's been amazing for me to teach the gospel of John to 5th and 6th graders on Wednesday nights this year. We've been studying the book verse by verse. Studying each miracle...each group of people that Jesus encountered and taught. I love seeing these young students absorb this scripture. One of the themes we've come across is how so often, those who claimed to believe Jesus and even his disciples grumbled and struggled with Jesus' teachings and the change He was striving to bring to their lives--and yet here He was the Son of God offering them EVERYTHING yet they were too stuck on the way it had always been. I love in Chapter 8 how they are arguing with Jesus about claiming Abraham as their father--they don't get. They didn't understand that here was their Father right in front of them. Chapter 8 verse 31-32 really stands out to me: Jesus said, "If you hold to my teaching you are really my disciples. Then you will know the truth, and the truth will set you free."

It's been pretty humbling to realize in my own life how many times I've wanted to hold on to my own way instead of God's teachings for me. That God has offered my freedom through His truth...through His Son & often I stubbornly cling to what I want because of my fear of change. Yet, how beautiful it is, in the moments I let go and instead of clinging on to my own stubborn will--cling on to my Savior and allow Him to change me little by little.

I look a little differently this afternoon with my glasses than I did this morning. I pray they would be a constant a reminder to allow myself to never be content with staying the same. To aim and strive to embrace they change that comes in following and living for Jesus.

"I am the light of the world. Whoever follows me will never walk in darkness, but will have the light of life." John 7:40