Being raised in the church,
feeling called to full time ministry at a young age and working in a local
church for the past ten Christmas seasons has meant that Advent has always been
on my radar.
We usually start thinking
about it in our curriculum and calendar planning late summer. I love the
Christmas story in the Gospels. I often study it again in July because I am
always drawn to God’s use of those unexpected players in the arrival of His
Son. I love the shepherds and their casted out, dirty job that was used in such a
bold way to share the news of Jesus in the world. I love the faithfulness of
Mary and Joseph as young people seeking to be obedient. It is not lost on me
that Jesus entered the world in a humble and beautiful way and that God seeks
to use each of us in humble and beautiful ways.
If I’m honest with myself,
Advent has never been a season of waiting or expecting for me beyond my own
busy calendar and ministry schedule. I have always held on to the fact that I
love the story. It’s the heart of the season. Emmanuel, God is with us. But to
really grasp the knowledge that these weeks before Christmas are to be a time
of clinging to my Father for His hope---between the Christmas parties, open
houses, musical performances, it never crossed my mind, mainly because I did not leave space or room for its meaning to do so.
The weeks of Advent this
year have been heart changing. In the past month, my entire focus and heart
shift has been about waiting, expecting and trusting God to show up with His hope.
Instead of loving the Christmas story of how Jesus came I find myself feeling
like I can relate to those who lived out that first Christmas. The sense that
in the midst of what feels scary and impossible all I can do is cling to my God
and wait for His timing. To trust in my Father who WILL show up always.
This is not a post saying to
cancel your Christmas parties or clear your calendar. What a joy each of those
events can bring and add this season. This is a post simply saying that this
year I truly get it. The waiting and expecting have broken my heart as I seek
the Hope that is to come. In the countless of times that await me when I do not understand or when I fill up my days with busy again I am
clinging to the Hope that my Father will remind me. He will remind me that in the waiting He is
with me and I can continue to expect Him to show up in the best ways I cannot
even begin to imagine.
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